October 19th, 2005
|12:05 am - The exodus of friends continues . . .|
One of the side effects of being Evil Incarnate . . .
~~ sighs ~~
~~ twirls her pointy tail ~~
~~ sings Voltaire's "When You're Evil" to cheer herself up ~~
~~ twirls her pointy tail some more ~~
~~ starts to read "Pariah-hood for Dummies" ~~
Current Mood: resigned
Current Music: "When You're Evil" by Voltaire
|Date:||October 20th, 2005 05:13 am (UTC)|| |
Re: To sum up...
As to your first point -- generally I'm easy-going. I will often not react to a provocation. But sometimes I do -- I do have a temper you know! Even if I rarely display it.
And I was not surprised by people's reactions -- I expected them. I knew that there would be consequences to my actions -- and what they were likely to be. I spent a long sleepless night, waiting for it to grow light enough to leave, contemplating the repercussions of my leaving.
As to your second point --
I do think, however, that you probably owe RBDarkly an apology. She was not only your host, but was in the middle of a grieving process, one that you were being present to support. To leave without speaking to your host is just rude, even if you've just had a knock-down drag-out with one of the guests.
That was done days ago -- that very day in fact. I had to wait for her to be awake first. I didn't want to wake her up at the time -- she needed the rest. I was trying to be as quiet and discreet as possible in my departure.
At the very least someone should have delivered a message to her on your behalf.
People were asleep when I gathered my things and left. The one person I remember seeing was also a participant in this -- although less so than others -- and I couldn't trust myself not to burst into tears and cause a big scene, which I did not want. I was trying very hard to avoid that by leaving quietly when I did and in the manner I did. I was attempting to be discreet and not cause a fuss. So he received a non-verbal goodbye as I headed out the door with my stuff. I'm not even sure how awake he was anyway -- and I didn't want any questions, since I was sure I'd start blubbering then.
As to your third point --
There's what your actual rights were in the relationship. It's obvious that that was unclear. I feel that this is probably the root of almost all of the problems.
That is such an understatement!!!!
I feel that those rights underwent a change when the move was made from his home to hers. Everything changed then.
it would probably be wise to seek ways to move past it instead of holding onto it with the deathgrip you've got.
That is what I've been doing -- I am going through a grieving process for what I once had. Not everyone grieves at the same pace nor in the same manner.
As to your fourth point -- I see more shades of gray than perhaps you realize.
Therapy is a very common answer to life's problems.
I have another.
Just accept that sometimes life sucks -- and not in a fun way. And that there may be very little you can do about it -- if anything at all.
Persephone the Stoic